Power and Control Over

In the Pagan Community there are many stories of abuse endured, witnessed, etc. All of these stories are heart breaking as there really is no need for the treatment of a sentient being in this manner. However Abuse happens and the best we can do is to know it for what it is so that we can act appropriately when found.

According to the YouTube channel PsycheTruth "Signs of Domestic Violence and Abuse, How to Identify an Abuser" there are 8 distinctive signs of abuse.
  1. Using Coercion or Threats
  2. Using Economic - withholding money or causing difficulties in acquiring money
  3. Using Privilege 
  4. Using Children - either as pawns or threats to take them away
  5. Minimizing, Denying, and Blaming - telling you that you are worthless
  6. Using Isolation - keeping you from others, behaving in a manner that causes you to isolate yourself
  7. Using Emotions - guilt trips, anger avoidance
  8. Using Intimidation
As Pagans we need to be aware of these things and those who are in oath bound traditions need to be even more aware of them. This is due to the nature of practice. I have personally been on the receiving end of some behavior from an Oath Bound Tradition that has been stretchy at best and could possibly be considered abuse. But I am not a mental health specialist and I am not trained to identify or name abuse, so we will leave it as possible abuse.

The behavior I encountered used coercion in the form of a measure. I encountered the use of privilege in those with higher knowledge markers leading conversations to dead ends by giving just enough information to cause a question to be asked and answering said question with "that's oath bound I can't answer you." I have been minimized by being told that I was weak and a spoiled brat for pointing out that something was potentially harmful, turned out I was right and got hurt. I was further minimized by being told that it was my fault I got hurt. I was isolated in that I was told I couldn't speak to others after being hurt because I took an oath not to. My emotions were used in many ways to get me to stop attempting to hold those who harmed me responsible. Threats were used to attempt to silence me.

 None of this worked. I am rather hard headed and I like to believe I had help from one of the gods in my chosen pantheon. 

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