Listen!

Listen. Listen. All the fun variations of the word.

We all want to feel like the other person is listening.

We all think we are listening.

But then ... something happens ... we realize the other or ourselves were not listening.

In some cases I have no doubt memory was to blame. After all there is so much we have to remember from day to day and the brain likes to prioritize it's resources. Not to mention something's are just difficult for people to remember.

For me it's names and dates. If it wasn't for a daily planner and doggily sticking to writing in things I would end up double, even triple, booking myself. Names, geeze, I can have a 30 minute or more conversation with a person and not know their name, but show me a picture and I will recall all of the other things talked about. Not knowing a name has never bothered me.

So what is this Listening, yes with a capital L, thing?

According to dictionary.com Listen is

1. to give attention with the ear; attend closely for the purpose of hearing; give ear.

But I don't think that is the fullness of what people are looking for. People seem to want you to not only understand the words said, but those not said. To empathize in some way. To be remembered. Because in doing so you justify their existence. 

So perhaps that is really what is to blame behind this recent lack of feeling people are listening, people are not justifying the person speaking. 

Since when has our collective self needed to be justified beyond that of existing? Is not the fact that you exist justification enough? Why do you need you to justify your exisitance?